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Reflection

Malang, 15 Desember 2015

When I was a kid, I used to think that I’m in competition with everyone especially my classmates and playmates. We struggled to get the best score and rank in our class.  We did that just because we wanted the others to adore us. Yeah kids like to be complimented. And that continued until I got into college. If I think about it again, I feel so funny. That was so silly. I was envy with my friend’s score and achievement. I wanted to get the better ones than her. I studied so hard so I could get what I wanted. But when I failed I cursed my friend and hoped that she would fail too. Oh My God..How cruel I was! Thinking about it over again makes me realize something. Putting yourself in competition with others is so tiring! Sometimes it’s good to motivate yourself. But yeah, I don’t find it interesting anymore now.

Every human being is different from others. So am I! We have some parts which might be the same. But, we also have several things which aren’t so alike. If you think you can compete everything with someone close to you, I don’t think that’s necessary. You would never find it’s enough for you. You would always compare yourself with others. You will try to be better than him/her. Sometimes it’s good. But if you go too far, you will lose yourself. You will lose your precious time just for winning over something which only fulfills your self-satisfaction. Is it worthy? Not always. In my opinion, it is futile.

I can say that now I’m in competition with myself. And I feel it’s better than having competitions with others. I know what I’m doing and I know what is lack from me. I want to achieve something so I’ll try to find the way to get it. I know I have limits so I’m gonna find the breakthrough. Is it only about me? No! I want more than it. I want to give something to others. Maybe it is kind of self-satisfaction. But at least this self-satisfaction can be useful for other people. This is what I’m currently trying to do. I want to know more about things that I can do. I want to cease the hatred and arrogance within me. I want to change them into positive energy that empowers me to move on. It’s about me. It’s about change that I need. I know it is not easy. But I have to try.

PS --> It should be posted last month in December. Since I don't have time to post it yeah so here it is.


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Comments

  1. Bayu Rohmantika YaminJanuary 17, 2016 at 9:06 PM

    Wow. Nice thoughts.

    I agree with your opinion about competition. People always comparing each other. There will be people who always "appear" to be better than us. The circle never stop. We need to stop thinking like that. We are what we think, and we should be proud of ourselves.

    Finally, you did the right thing. We need to give something to others, that will give you energy every day :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Izzatur RahmaniyahJanuary 22, 2016 at 3:55 PM

      Thank you so much for your feedback Bayu. I think this way is much better than always comparing ourself with others. :D

      Delete

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